Inside The Block 2023 Kitchens, Butler’s and Laundry Reveals: Beautiful Zones that Lacked Usability

There was so much to take in during this week’s The Block 2023 kitchen, butlers and laundry reveals. My eyes were doing more work than Sharon Osbourne’s plastic surgeon. While most looked lovely, the major issue was, for some, a lack of usability.

I thought long and hard about this one, and have come up with a ranking I feel is justified considering we had to take into account three zones, the cohesion between them, and how these spaces sit in the home overall:

1. Kyle and Leslie should have come first
2. Eliza and Liberty for second place
3. Kristy and Brett come third
4. Steph and Gian tie with Leah and Ash for last

With so many zones to talk through, as well as the layout and floor plan blunders to address, let’s not waste another minute. Scroll on as we judge The Block 2023 kitchens, butler’s pantries and laundries.

Eliza and Liberty Came First

Eliza and Liberty had the largest footprint to play with, which is great in one respect, but it can be easy to award them the win just because they have the most space. I don’t feel first place was warranted here, but it was quite a good result.

Of course, we know that the oven and rangehood have no place here. They cannot sit with us. I’ve not seen something this orange and inappropriate since Pauline Hanson entered Parliament. The punch of orange the girls put in every room is not doing it for me personally.

That said, if they wanted the orange to be the star, then the brass accents needed to go. There are competing forces at play. And while I do enjoy the stone, it’s too thick my for design eye. But outside of those two issues, the visual in this kitchen is pretty lovely.

This is the best room they’ve produced by a mile.

The Butler’s Pantry and Laundry Were Less Successful

They were spoilt for space, but they didn’t use it as well as they could have. I don’t understand why they chose to have that strange linen cupboard in the laundry instead of a larger butler’s pantry. Surely you want a linen cupboard closer to the bedrooms?

I feel like that linen cupboard is where you go to hide from the kids, have a cry and down a Savvy B in the privacy of your very own enclosed cabinetry cave. A 750ml bottle rolls up very nicely inside a standard bath towel, just sayin’.

There’s nowhere to fold things in the laundry either, no horizontal surfaces. This is a classic case of a team having so much room that they didn’t quite know what to do with it. A better layout was possible here.

Kristy and Brett Came Second

Let’s keep it 100 you guys; that stone is more delicious than the moment all three Traitors wrote ‘steal’ and went home with zero prize money. I’m smitten over it like a lovesick teenager. I’ve imagined the day we marry and worked out how many kids we’ll have (one, btw, and we’re naming him Ron Burgundy).

But here’s the truth bomb: without it, this kitchen is light on wow-factor. The cabinetry handles I do enjoy, but that’s where it ends. The white cabinets also don’t sit that nicely against the stone and silver dishwasher. They’re clashing a bit.

And while I’ve never met a bottle of wine I haven’t enjoyed, I feel a bar zone with two smaller wine fridges below a benchtop would be better that the two taller ones in this kitchen. Bar zones offer more flexibility, because not everyone’s into wine (I’ve not met these people but I’m told they exist).

The Spatial Issues in this Kitchen Are Abundant

While I love the kitchen stools, and the dining setting, it all needs to go. There’s barely any room here. As a designer, it all starts with boring stuff like spatial planning and layout, way before you get to the pretty product selection process. Kristy and Brett skipped a few steps.

The sheers are also a lot and feel theatrical. I expect the cast of Chicago to bust out from behind them with a rendition of All That Jazz. A reduction in all that fabric would be helpful. Keep it to the one wall of glass and let some art shine on the plastered section of adjacent wall.

It’s a nice space, don’t get me wrong, but it’s obvious some amendments needs to be made.

The Butler’s Pantry and Laundry Were Better

The butler’s pantry from Kristy and Brett was quite beautiful. Plenty of storage, loads of display space, and with an extra dishwasher and basin. It ticks all the boxes, and I can’t really fault it.

I also enjoy the laundry. The concept of the dog bed quite charming. The floor tiles I also adore. And can we talk about the drying cupboard? I’ve not used one myself but it’s on my bucket list along with meeting a Spice Girl and convincing that Spice Girl to tour in 2024 with the other four. It’s Victoria. I need to meet Victoria.

These two spaces are more successful than the kitchen is (even though the laundry is short on countertop space). I think some burgundy accents in these rooms would have tied all three zones together, even if it was just a vase or some artwork.

Kyle and Leslie Came Third

Though small (and in need of rectification come re-do week), I really liked Kyle and Leslie’s living and dining room. The kitchen that carries on from those two spaces is equally impressive and feels incredibly cohesive. They should have won the week.

Visually there are some really captivating moments. The curve in the island benchtop is one of the standouts. Not only is the stone itself rather luscious, but combined with the timber slats the whole situation is a textural dream I don’t want to take up from.

I would have had black stools instead of the oak ones, and you won’t read any design book ever that suggests Doritos in a bowl as a styling suggestion, but outside of that I’m sold.

The Butler’s Pantry and Laundry Weren’t As Strong

Is the obsession with curves a bit much in this home? Sure. But this is going to be a truly unique property at the end and I’m here for it. What Kyle and Leslie did though is pack so many curves into the kitchen, and left the other two zones begging for some.

The butler’s and laundry are both beautiful rooms, feel calm and inviting, and have all the functional elements included. And I’m sure most people wouldn’t walk in and wonder where the curves are. But I’m peckish for something in these two spaces, just so the story stays consistent.

Honestly though, a top-tier Block kitchen that I reckon so many people would fall over themselves to spend time in. A winner in my eyes.

Leah and Ash Came Fourth

It’s going to shock you to read this, so have the Bex ready and your head on a pillow: I love the visual of this kitchen! I find it absolutely rich and intoxicating. I’m obsessed with the tiles around the island, I adore the stone on top, and I’m smitten with the stools.

I find it stylistically connected to their main bedroom from last week. I’m finally seeing cohesion in this home. Here’s the curse to this blessing though: the beauty of this kitchen makes me dislike their living and dining room even more. The kitchen feels luxe, the adjoining rooms feel disastrous.

I can see what Leah and Ash were going for here, and they did pull it off from a looks perspective. So many of their spaces so far are a swing and a miss, like they were trying for something bold and didn’t quite finesse it. But in this kitchen they got there.

Sadly the Floor Plan Killed the Dream

I’m not certain the space is large enough for a butler’s pantry. I looked at the floor plan briefly when it flashed across the screen, and maybe if they moved the kitchen toward the dining roome and reoriented the space they could make it work. But like this, the layout feels wrong.

That big wall of walnut cabinetry cutting between the kitchen and butler’s feels intrusive. It would make sense to take it down and have this kitchen as one much larger space with an appliance cupboard in it, where you could shut away mess when you have people over.

Then you could have had a larger island with a double sink and a kitchen that feels open, airy and spacious. As it stands this feels like a kitchen in a city apartment when it needs to feel grander. Love the look though!

The Laundry Placement is Unforgivable

Nobody will convince me that walking through a bathroom to get to the laundry is a wise idea. Imagine you want to put on a load of darks but can’t because someone’s in the loo doing their own load of darks (sorry, I couldn’t pass up the opportunity to make that joke).

This is a major issue that would prevent someone from purchasing the property. Luxe laundries are spaces you want to spend time in. In this home you’ll need to battle through the fog with an Ambi Pur in hand before you even reach it. And once inside, you have a view of a bathroom. Its bonkers.

Sadly that’s why Leah and Ash get my vote for last this week. The spaces might look lovely but the floorplan is more baffling than Pythagoras’ theorem.

Steph and Gian Came Last

It pains me to admit that last place for Steph and Gian is deserving. They too had rooms that looked gorgeous, just like Leah and Ash, but so much of the functionality had been forgotten or ignored.

Let’s start with the visual; truly breathtaking. I’ve not seeing anything like it on The Block before, and for that I thank the design gods. The stone, the cabinetry handles, the stools, the tapware; the list of sexy things in this kitchen is longer than any story told by any elderly male.

And I love that they decided to place the kitchen here. A successful floorplan.

The only things I’m not keen on visually are the black wall lights above the sink. There’s something outdoor about them. I feel I need to stand under them at night, in a trench coat and fedora, smoking a cigar. Know what I mean?

The Functional Issues Were Ample

As the judges pointed out, there were a number of issues in terms of functionality.

The cooktop in the island was a no go for me. I generally don’t enjoy them in an island, but here you’re just sat too close to it. This is not a teppanyaki restaurant and I am not catching the egg fried rice. The sink and cooktop would make more sense swapped around.

There was also a lack of storage. It feels like they created a show kitchen, not a working one. You don’t want to travel around to the Butler’s pantry for everything. The pantry itself was lovely, it’s just doing too much of the work.

The laundry was large, looked nice and functioned well. A touch on the dark side compared to the kitchen, but nice all the same.

What did you make of The Block 2023 kitchens, butler’s pantry and laundry reveal? Drop a comment below and share your thoughts.

Images by David Cook Photography, courtesy of The Block Shop. For more info on The Block 2023 kitchens, butler’s pantry and laundry reveal, check out NineNow.