Design Wins and Sins from The Block 2023 Kids Bedrooms Reveal

The Block 2023 kids bedrooms reveal had me a bit stumped, I won’t lie. Unless a millionaire child is coming to auction with a cheque book in hand (is North West Kardashian building a property portfolio?), why is so much emphasis placed on impressing the little ones?

From basketball rooms to stages-with-curtains, things got very specific, making this one a tough reveal to critique. If we’re aiming to sell these homes to real people, a more mainstream bedroom that appeals to many would be the preferred strategy, surely?

If that same charity guy who buys three homes every season is the one to snap them up, then are we to judge the rooms based on who delivered the most-fun space for kids to play in?

I don’t have all the answers, but I do know that I have no idea what (outside of Steph and Gian deserving the win) the scoreboard should have looked like this week. But let’s review each space anyway and perhaps you can tell me…

Steph and Gian Came First

Steph and Gian’s first kids bedroom, seen above, sits perfectly amongst the other zones in the property, and is easily converted into a room fit for another purpose should the buyer need it to. They walked the line perfectly here; it wows the kids without being too functionally fixed.

This room is so successful in inducing cluckiness that couples across the country were heard going at it hammer and tong before the episode finished airing. If only Scott Cam knew how many babies were conceived to the sound of him giving feedback and spinning a chalkboard!

Was the room above a little busy? Sure. Did they need to repeat the three ceiling lights in here that were in the dining room? They did not. But all in all it’s a really successful space that you can’t deny deserved the win.

The Second Kids Bedroom Was Even Better

The palette in both rooms is divine, but in the second kids bedroom from Steph and Gian it’s a real standout. It feels charming and nostalgic. The bright, garish colours you see in so many kids rooms are nowhere to be found here. Instead, they kept it muted – and it paid off.

I feel the same way about this room as the first one, in that it’s a bit busy. They didn’t need to stuff it with so many ‘child’ cues. A plush toy on each bed would have done the trick, and allowed their work to shine a little more. And we can do without the crayons and paper on the table as well.

The seating zone that sits inside the cabinetry would have worked better if it were swapped out for a desk. It would have given the room more longevity; the kid could grow with it. But outside of that I wouldn’t change anything else.

Leah and Ash Came Second

I really don’t know what to make of this first kids zone from Leah and Ash, but it is appealing to a narrow market of small rock climbing protégés, that we can agree on. Trips to the ER are a given for the future owner, when their kid is meant to be sleeping but instead goes on an unsupervised bone breaking ascent at 2am.

The Memphis style they’ve run with here doesn’t really connect with what they’re doing in the rest of the house either. And to undo that rock climbing wall is a fair amount of work. So for both of those reasons I have to deem this room unsuccessful.

If this was a makeover show where they were designing for a specific child, in a family who lived in the home already, I’d be all for it. It’s fun! But a room in a house-to-sell, I’m not feeling it. The potential to put off a set of buyers is just too great.

The Second Kids Bedroom Was Better

I say better, but I mean more easily adapted into a teen bedroom without too much work. Although a buyer might not be confident of the size of bed they could fit in the space because Leah and Ash opted for a daybed here instead or the real thing.

As a child I would’ve loved the stage area, so that’s kinda cute. Of course, I’d need a hole in the floor so I could rise up from underneath it like Kylie Minogue did at the start of her Showgirl tour. I couldn’t have been expected to put on performances for my family at age 10 without making a grand entrance. What would that look like?

Still, this all feels made for a specific child who lives in the home already. There’s very little mass appeal, and so much opportunity to put off a buyer who has no kids, older kids, or kids who don’t enjoy the unparalleled bliss involved in putting on a bedroom disco. So again, it’s all a bit too narrow in theme.

Kristy and Brett Came Third

Don’t come at me, but I have to live in my truth here. And here it is: this room is a snooze. Outside of the removable wallpaper, which works nicely for a kids bedroom, everything else is pretty basic, pretty kids-room-by-numbers.

Green wall, sheer curtains, timber bed, the teepee. There’s nothing inherently bad with any of these things individually, but I’ve seen this room before. I’ve seen it a lot. I’m not getting much imagination, no inspiration, and certainly no elevation.

It’s neither here nor there for me. Nothing is horrible, but nothing is great. I feel the same way about this room as I do about the four episodes of the Beckham documentary I fast-forwarded through most of: um, ok!?

The Floral Wallpaper Bedroom Was a Choice

We all make questionable choices in life. Who hasn’t worn glow-in-the-dark pants from Hound Dog out clubbing in the early 2000s (or what that just me?). Deciding to cover a ceiling in floral wallpaper is another one of those choices.

Unlike my fluorescent pants, the wallpaper in this bedroom is hard to remove (which isn’t saying much considering how often my pants came off at the turn of the millennium). But you get my point; the wallpaper on the ceiling is not a good look or an easy fix. On the wall I don’t mind it, but the ceiling is a step too far. It makes the room feel smaller.

The space itself is rather well put together, in terms of the wallpaper teaming nicely with the bed, side tables, floor rug and styling. It’s quite striking if you’re into florals. If they just had the restraint to keep the paper off the ceiling the room would have soared.

Eliza and Liberty Came Fourth

I don’t want to be Deborah Downer, but this kids bedroom from Eliza and Liberty is not evoking fun. It’s not evoking refinement. It’s not creating any sort of emotional connection. It didn’t lean ‘kid’ enough nor did it go ‘adult’ enough. So it’s a confused space with no design intent.

There are few things holding this room back. The first is the wallpaper. The design itself is rather lovely, but not for a kids space. I see it in a dimly lit hotel bar, where I’ve had too many espresso martinis and the heart palpitations are kicking in. It also doesn’t work against the second issue: the bed.

The bed and bedsides look like a package deal suite from a budget chain (the ultimate design crime). It’s a lot of white timber and it cheapens the overall vibe of the space. I enjoy the carpet and joinery, but outside of that it feels a bit drab.

It Doesn’t Get Better in the Second Kids Bedroom

Eliza and Liberty’s second kids bedroom is not as drab as the first space but it definitely feels undercooked. There’s just not much happening. Again, the wallpaper is fine, but they needed to pair it with furniture and decor that elevated it.

A fabric bed would have been so much better here. It would have worked with the wallpaper and carpet more. A curved bed in boucle would have been magical, layered up with pillows, cushions in throws in warm tones. And art: where is the art? That wallpaper is crying out for some whimsical art over it.

This room is so apologetic. It’s shy. It’s fading into the background. Like Christina Aguilera at the start of Beautiful, it’s whispering, “don’t look at me”.

Kyle and Leslie Came Last

The basketball-themed kids room from Kyle and Leslie was not a slam dunk (that’s the one and only sports reference you’ll get from me). I agree with the judges that it’s way too specific a theme and won’t appeal to a wider market.

If I walked into this home as a child I would have gasped, recoiled, and demanded to know where the Spice Girls and 90210 posters were. But then again, I was a unique teenager with elevated tastes.

In all seriousness though, this kids room is a bit full-on, and doesn’t even remotely resemble the aesthetic in the rest of the home. A potential buyer who adores the calm, neutral vibe Kyle and Leslie have created so far, will get to this room and feel rather baffled by it.

The blue cabinetry you see in the image above is rather gorgeous though.

The Green Kids Room Was Better

The second kids room from Kyle and Leslie definitely felt more reflective of their style, and it managed to avoid themes altogether. This room is an all-gender, all-ages kind of space and it works nicely from a colour and mood perspective.

There’s a little too much going on though. The wall above the bed covered in wallpaper isn’t a bad idea, but with the paneling and the odd window and the wall lights and the sheers… it’s getting a little visually busy.

They would have been wise to let the angles and shapes do the work here and calm everything else down. That small window also has to go. Like any elderly man wearing speedos on the beach, I need it covered over immediately. Did they deserve to come last? I don’t think so.

What did you make of The Block 2023 kids bedrooms reveal? Drop a comment below and share your thoughts.

Images by David Cook Photography, courtesy of The Block Shop. For more info on The Block 2023 kids bedrooms reveal, check out NineNow.